Is it everything you dreamed that it would be

an unspeakable pain. in my heart. i mean, in my throat. and literally, it makes me un-speak-able [un-able-to-speak]. which is why i had to postpone today's vox lesson to friday. but looking forward to it as always! (even tho i feel super depressed sometimes when i can't get my voice to execute what i was supposed to do, but super thrilled when i do! bet huiting's enjoying her first drum lesson at music lab right now)

anyways, omg omg big news!! praise the Lord for everything! i've finally received a call yesterday from the company i went to for an interview abt a couple of wks ago and another email today to confirm the date of the orientation training! i am finally starting work! (even though it's not confirmed i'm gonna be recruited from among like don't know how many other people: 10-12?) note to self: have to read up even more on autism.

haha, God is really interesting. Gkidz again this Sunday! more training for me! haha which is good cos i will be offically serving in Gkidz next year. but haha had to request for help, don't think i can do it by myself as of yet. and huiting got pulled into it lol (ok i can't be bothered la - no embellisments or fancy words today).

kinda looking forward to the next half of this week. 715 prayer walk at NUS. a trip to kinokuniya with Valerie & Vanessa on thurs - time for rewards! (superbly happy for all of my tuition kids - much improvement! praise the Lord!) vox lesson on fri. Gkidz on sunday. more activities to come please!

Truth is, there is an unspeakable pain in my heart. One that is mixed with shock, confusion and exhaustion. I'm ready to give this up. Already given it all to You, Lord. Should've done it right from the start. No more resistance.

Is it everything you've dreamed that it would be

When the world was younger

And you had everything to lose

No, it wasn't everything I dreamed that it would be. And I still have everything to lose. I thought I've escaped from this kind of ____. I thought that this time was different. Apparently it's not. How I wish this could be emptied out.