i realize, i realize, i realize

haha im going to make this the lamest post i've ever made.

i know that it's useless to write anything here right now cos i'm not in the mood to go in-depth into writing anything. anything im gonna say here is going to be shallow cos i now realize how pointless it is to blog when you've got someone who knows you inside out to talk to. someone who created you in your mother's womb from day one. but i guess again i sometimes just wanna blog to vent.

it's been an eventful couple of days. graduation, cell, YA and lots of stuff in between. a lot of thinking, a lot of reading, a lot of processing and of cos, tons of "dialoguing" with the one who created me. and i realize i've got so much to grow. and i get depressed knowing that i've still got such a long way to go, and frankly, a bit tired. cos i realize that i've been leaning on my own strength to get through. which is why i'm tired, heh. and which is why... i cannot lean on my own strength. but to always always lean on Him: "I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." (Philippians 4:13) and to remain in Him always: "Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me." (John 15:4)

and after all the realization, i realize (for the lack of vocabulary and oversupply of dead brain cells) that i don't have much time for anything else. so many areas to grow in, so many things to learn, so many things to do. and yet foolishly there i was, wasting my time on something that i thought was there. shall not elaborate but will now proceed to move on and do what God wants me to do now.

haahah seems like this is not such a lame post after all.